LOVE

in retrospect
maybe staying friends is the best way out afterall
having good simple clean fun
no complications, no strings attached
100% hassle-free
no missing pangs, no heartache
and your heart's for you to keep
not out there lying in the open
vulnerable to hurt and betrayal
easy prey to suspicion distrust and self doubt

many say
it's better to have loved and lost...
... than not to have loved at all.

i don't know why
but relationships of the ppl around me affect me
maybe it evokes a stinging reminder
of the many crazy emotional hellholes
i personally dug, fell and bury myself in.

the way i fall - it's hard. and fast.
no looking back
all preconceived notions of caution gone with the wind
friends' endless advice of "be careful, protect yourself" left unheeded.
days of moping at home soon follow
unreasonable snappish tantrums thrown at mum and dad
where the sky seems painted in perpetual grey
listless and restless
nothing you do seemed right
and all it takes
is a familiar song playing on the radio,

a place, or even just a word
to feel that savage wrench in your heart
all squeezed and drained.